1928: Association of Communist Organizations forms to raise funds for the new international labor organization REVOLUTION NOW! The two organizations are committed to building camps worldwide where communists and union thugs will be secretly trained to defeat capitalism. George Soros's grandfather is seen smoking dope and consorting with prostitutes at a camp built high in Mexico's Sierre Madre mountains where vacationing capitalists are kidnapped, held for ransom and regularly flogged by campers.
1935: REVOLUTION NOW! is dismantled and its members are hired by the newly formed United Auto Workers. Applicants were told by ACO to lie on their applications just so they would be comfortable lying. This ability to lie became the trademark of ACO as it slowly evolved into ACORN.
". . . marching proudly back to the future . . . "
Monday, September 21, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Tim Pawlenty Primer
Tim Pawlenty is running for president. Watch Tim run. Run, Tim, run. Run run run.
He is Republican governor of Minnesota. What do Republican governors do? Fight Democrats. Watch Tim fight all the Democrats in Minnesota. Over anything. Fight, Tim, fight. Just say no, Tim. No no no.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Ask Your Health Plan lobbyist
And you thought you couldn't afford a lobbyist! Or good health insurance!
How wrong you were. Now, because of the great work that Your Health Plan lobbyist and his colleagues have done, you can get the very best coverage Your Health Plan can afford, and without the nuisance of lines, embarrassing questions, pokes or prods. Just ask Your Health Plan lobbyist! And get your answers right away! What does that pain in your stomach mean? Do you really need a second opinion? Should you buy the expensive drug your have been using - or will two aspirin and a good night's rest do just as well?
Your Health Plan is offering you this one-time offer today only for just $250 a month. Your Health Plan lobbyist will be there for you 24/7 and you won't have to leave your house, find a parking spot, wait in a doctor's office (like a Canadian!), or have to answer embarrassing questions about weight, drinking habits, sexual activities, and who knows what else.
Plus you'll get your questions answered and a clear-cut, no-nonsense plan of action that will get you healthy again and keep Your Health Plan healthy for decades so it will always be there when you need it!
As an added bonus, say you saw this offer here on this website and get a free invitation to Your Health Plan lobbyist's next fundraiser for your favorite local elected officials!
Sign up today and keep your health care costs from bankrupting Your Health Plan.
The following is an example of the excellent medical advice you can get when you have your own personal health plan lobbyist working for you instead of against you.
Dear Health Plan lobbyist:
I'm so thankful for a medical plan I can afford that also won't ruin our great country and lead to socialism, communism, fascism and Nazism. Thank you for your efforts at keeping our country great! But here's my problem: I can't straighten my leg out. My knee is really big, too. And a funny color. And my dog won't come over when I call it, probably because my knee smells really bad.
Thanks for any help you can give me. And keep up your good work on keeping America great and competitive!
Sincerely, Aching in Arkansas
Monday, August 31, 2009
Beat the death panels! or: The Granny Survivalist Guide
They are doing heroic work fighting the granny-killing death panels over at savegranny.com, keepyoursocialisthandsoffmygranny.com, grannygetsagun.org among others. It's too early to say if granny killers been defeated, but everyone can be confident that granny is safer today than she was two weeks ago.
But the problem is: can you trust a man who is afraid to show you his birth certificate? If someone asked to see mine, I'd show it. I'm proud of it. I was born in America and I'm not afraid to let folks now. In fact, I plan to tape a copy to my front door so everyone can see it.
Will he do the same on the front door of the White House?
We can't relax yet. That's why all those fine folk at those God-fearing, abortionist-hating, patriotic websites listed above have a Plan B, just in case the death panels get life breathed into them: products, programs, guidelines and exercises you and granny can do to help her beat the death panels.
We've listed some of the ones we like here. To us, these are heart-warming examples of what made America great: real Americans coming together against those liberal atheist baby-killing unreal Americans and beating the living daylights out of them. And, you know, it's inspiring, too. And isn't it just great fun? I'd forgotten how much I enjoy it!
1. Granny's A Warrior! From the folks at savegranny.com comes this program based on the Navy SEAL program that so successfully taught our commandos to withstand brutal torture at the hands of jihadists. And don't think Granny standing in front of a Death Panel won't be torture! They'll make her stand there for hours without shoes or her orthopedic inserts. They might also turn the air conditioner way up, so she'll be cold and tired. It's all set up so they can say she's no longer of much value and can be put down like an old horse and then shipped to the flue factory. But this Granny's A Warrior program will give her the upper hand. So much so that by the time the Death Panel is done with her, they'll be voting to kill themselves!
2. Granny's Guns Talk! How about a little gun rack that will fit on any wheelchair, walker, cane or neck brace? Have Granny appear before that Death Panel with an assault rifle bigger than she is! Those freedom-hating liberals will wet their pants and run back to their Ivory Towers!
3. Grannies Who Cook! Except now it's more than meat and potatoes. Keepyoursocialisthandsoffmygranny.com will send Granny lots of easy recipes to bring to the Death Panel, including some that require her to shop at her local medical marijuana shop. Give one of those treats to the Death Panels and they won't where they are. Plus they won't remember much about Granny, so she'll be safe at least until the Death Panels call for her again!
4. Surrogates For Granny. Hire a surrogate. We do this to make babies, why not to save Grannies? In this program, an elderly woman will study every detail about granny and go before the death panel in her place. The surrogate is fit, smart, sassy, tireless and charismatic, everything your Granny might not be. But the Death Panel won't know that. And while some people have problems with the morality of surrogacy, when it's to save Granny, it's OK. From Keepgrannyalive.net.
But the problem is: can you trust a man who is afraid to show you his birth certificate? If someone asked to see mine, I'd show it. I'm proud of it. I was born in America and I'm not afraid to let folks now. In fact, I plan to tape a copy to my front door so everyone can see it.
Will he do the same on the front door of the White House?
We can't relax yet. That's why all those fine folk at those God-fearing, abortionist-hating, patriotic websites listed above have a Plan B, just in case the death panels get life breathed into them: products, programs, guidelines and exercises you and granny can do to help her beat the death panels.
We've listed some of the ones we like here. To us, these are heart-warming examples of what made America great: real Americans coming together against those liberal atheist baby-killing unreal Americans and beating the living daylights out of them. And, you know, it's inspiring, too. And isn't it just great fun? I'd forgotten how much I enjoy it!
1. Granny's A Warrior! From the folks at savegranny.com comes this program based on the Navy SEAL program that so successfully taught our commandos to withstand brutal torture at the hands of jihadists. And don't think Granny standing in front of a Death Panel won't be torture! They'll make her stand there for hours without shoes or her orthopedic inserts. They might also turn the air conditioner way up, so she'll be cold and tired. It's all set up so they can say she's no longer of much value and can be put down like an old horse and then shipped to the flue factory. But this Granny's A Warrior program will give her the upper hand. So much so that by the time the Death Panel is done with her, they'll be voting to kill themselves!
2. Granny's Guns Talk! How about a little gun rack that will fit on any wheelchair, walker, cane or neck brace? Have Granny appear before that Death Panel with an assault rifle bigger than she is! Those freedom-hating liberals will wet their pants and run back to their Ivory Towers!
3. Grannies Who Cook! Except now it's more than meat and potatoes. Keepyoursocialisthandsoffmygranny.com will send Granny lots of easy recipes to bring to the Death Panel, including some that require her to shop at her local medical marijuana shop. Give one of those treats to the Death Panels and they won't where they are. Plus they won't remember much about Granny, so she'll be safe at least until the Death Panels call for her again!
4. Surrogates For Granny. Hire a surrogate. We do this to make babies, why not to save Grannies? In this program, an elderly woman will study every detail about granny and go before the death panel in her place. The surrogate is fit, smart, sassy, tireless and charismatic, everything your Granny might not be. But the Death Panel won't know that. And while some people have problems with the morality of surrogacy, when it's to save Granny, it's OK. From Keepgrannyalive.net.
Monday, August 24, 2009
Jon Voight’s new movie fights the good fight
Can the universe be saved? Can America and Christians everywhere be kept from falling under the influence of secular humanists, liberals and all those unreal Americans from big cities and other planets?
Or will a few strong-willed, rugged men — all of whom have great hair, deep voices, and children who love them, by the way — somehow snap the hold these fake Americans have on us?
Those are the themes in this new, still untitled, Jon Voight sci-fi romance thriller. In it, Col. Chuck Williams, played by Voight, is retired and doing what he loves most — trying to convince his neighbors to keep guns around in case a band of “those unreal American, socialist, public-option, atheist, ACORN lovers come to town someday to register poor people to vote!”
“They look like us,” he continually warns anyone in earshot. “They drive cars like ours, listen to music like ours. They read our books, eat in our restaurants, date our women. They are starting to dress like us, too! You probably had some in your homes without realizing it. You might even be emailing or Twittering some of them.”
He looks very sad as he tells his neighbors these things.
It reminds him of the other great failure in his life; his gun giveaway program. They give away condoms in school, he told everyone who would listen. Why don’t we give away guns, too? Then our youth will be ready for whatever these socialist atheist Obama-loving unreal Americans have in mind.
But he could not convince others of the truth of his messages. His neighbors continued to allow secular humanists and ACORN organizers into their homes, where they often discussed loudly, late into the night, things like unions, boycotts, organic foods, and global warming — even in front of children! “It’s part of the master plan,” he realized. “They are going after the young kids, whose minds are not yet strong like mine. When I and those like me die, those youth will be the puppets of the socialists who want government to ration health care and kill our grannies!”
A love interest appears in his life unexpectedly one day when he is digging a bunker somewhere in the middle of his gated community. Far from the inner city, far away from any bus lines carrying low-paid workers to their jobs, a twenty-something blonde wanders in and sits down next to his gas grill. She is near death and isn’t sure how she got there. She thinks she was kidnapped by an ACORN worker from outer space, who transported her to their space ship where they gave her a physical exam and showed her how to use condoms and then gave her a copy of Saul Alinsky's “Rules for Radicals.”
Then they released her and she found her way to Col. Chuck, where she discovered her pockets were full of free condoms and “that Alinsky book”, as Col Chuck calls it. She is traumatized and wants to help him, so she asks what she can do to help save America. He says, “Just don’t tempt me. I can’t be carnal.”
And so begins an intense, but platonic relationship that ends when she decides she does not want to learn how to shoot a gun or even carry a gun to a town hall meeting organized by public-option advocates.
Almost too late, the truth of his message soon becomes apparent. In scattered hot spots around the world, people begin to burn their health insurance cards. They hold sit-ins in the golf courses all over the world that are favored by health insurance CEOs. They also speak loudly against the right of health insurance companies to charge whatever they want. It's becoming bedlam in many areas of the country, but Col. Chuck Williams knows what to do before this great country becomes a formerly great country paralyzed by socialism, atheism, liberalism, ACORNism, and unreal Americanism.
He teams up with a popular talk show host named Sean, both of whom have great hair. That means they are good leaders, because lots of real Americans think anyone with good hair genes probably have lots of other good genes, too. So together Sean and Col Chuck form a movement and an army and fight the good fight against the secular humanists, atheists, liberals, gun control advocates and all those unreal Americans from another planet who all live in big cities because they are afraid of the freedom of the wide open spaces of the American West. It's a long battle that goes on for several days, but they end up fighting to a draw, after which they retreat to their respective encampments.
They didn't win, but “we didn't lose,” Col. Chuck tells everyone. “So that's a victory.”
But then Col. Chuck goes on to greater glory. He finds that his hair and his voice talent bring him great attention, and he becomes the leader of gun lover’s and and tea baggers and real Americans everywhere. They so love him that they want him to become president of the nation. Or Sean. Sean could be president, too. Their team is deep, they now realize, so they know they can take on the unreal Americans from outer space who think it's OK if President Obama isn't a citizen and wants to give our country to ACORN.
Men follow him and women are drawn to him. They want to love him, to help him, but he knows it will be a long, difficult fight. So he still refuses to become carnal. Carnalism will weaken his message, he says, and blur his focus so that he might lose sight of the real enemy of America: the usurper Obama who wants to create Civil War and destroy real Americans so aliens from outer space and other countries can take over and take jobs from everyone. And raise taxes. Not to mention kill granny.
He can't let that happen.
So he stays awake nights, always wary, with his trusty gun within reach, certain that someone will try to slip some Viagra into his drinking water, causing uncontrollable urges that would lead to carnalism and then besmirch his good name and destroy him. “It is truly dangerous out there,” he thinks to himself.
But for now he is contented. He is waiting. Soon, it will all be his for the taking.
Stay tuned for the sequel.
Or will a few strong-willed, rugged men — all of whom have great hair, deep voices, and children who love them, by the way — somehow snap the hold these fake Americans have on us?
Those are the themes in this new, still untitled, Jon Voight sci-fi romance thriller. In it, Col. Chuck Williams, played by Voight, is retired and doing what he loves most — trying to convince his neighbors to keep guns around in case a band of “those unreal American, socialist, public-option, atheist, ACORN lovers come to town someday to register poor people to vote!”
“They look like us,” he continually warns anyone in earshot. “They drive cars like ours, listen to music like ours. They read our books, eat in our restaurants, date our women. They are starting to dress like us, too! You probably had some in your homes without realizing it. You might even be emailing or Twittering some of them.”
He looks very sad as he tells his neighbors these things.
It reminds him of the other great failure in his life; his gun giveaway program. They give away condoms in school, he told everyone who would listen. Why don’t we give away guns, too? Then our youth will be ready for whatever these socialist atheist Obama-loving unreal Americans have in mind.
But he could not convince others of the truth of his messages. His neighbors continued to allow secular humanists and ACORN organizers into their homes, where they often discussed loudly, late into the night, things like unions, boycotts, organic foods, and global warming — even in front of children! “It’s part of the master plan,” he realized. “They are going after the young kids, whose minds are not yet strong like mine. When I and those like me die, those youth will be the puppets of the socialists who want government to ration health care and kill our grannies!”
A love interest appears in his life unexpectedly one day when he is digging a bunker somewhere in the middle of his gated community. Far from the inner city, far away from any bus lines carrying low-paid workers to their jobs, a twenty-something blonde wanders in and sits down next to his gas grill. She is near death and isn’t sure how she got there. She thinks she was kidnapped by an ACORN worker from outer space, who transported her to their space ship where they gave her a physical exam and showed her how to use condoms and then gave her a copy of Saul Alinsky's “Rules for Radicals.”
Then they released her and she found her way to Col. Chuck, where she discovered her pockets were full of free condoms and “that Alinsky book”, as Col Chuck calls it. She is traumatized and wants to help him, so she asks what she can do to help save America. He says, “Just don’t tempt me. I can’t be carnal.”
And so begins an intense, but platonic relationship that ends when she decides she does not want to learn how to shoot a gun or even carry a gun to a town hall meeting organized by public-option advocates.
Almost too late, the truth of his message soon becomes apparent. In scattered hot spots around the world, people begin to burn their health insurance cards. They hold sit-ins in the golf courses all over the world that are favored by health insurance CEOs. They also speak loudly against the right of health insurance companies to charge whatever they want. It's becoming bedlam in many areas of the country, but Col. Chuck Williams knows what to do before this great country becomes a formerly great country paralyzed by socialism, atheism, liberalism, ACORNism, and unreal Americanism.
He teams up with a popular talk show host named Sean, both of whom have great hair. That means they are good leaders, because lots of real Americans think anyone with good hair genes probably have lots of other good genes, too. So together Sean and Col Chuck form a movement and an army and fight the good fight against the secular humanists, atheists, liberals, gun control advocates and all those unreal Americans from another planet who all live in big cities because they are afraid of the freedom of the wide open spaces of the American West. It's a long battle that goes on for several days, but they end up fighting to a draw, after which they retreat to their respective encampments.
They didn't win, but “we didn't lose,” Col. Chuck tells everyone. “So that's a victory.”
But then Col. Chuck goes on to greater glory. He finds that his hair and his voice talent bring him great attention, and he becomes the leader of gun lover’s and and tea baggers and real Americans everywhere. They so love him that they want him to become president of the nation. Or Sean. Sean could be president, too. Their team is deep, they now realize, so they know they can take on the unreal Americans from outer space who think it's OK if President Obama isn't a citizen and wants to give our country to ACORN.
Men follow him and women are drawn to him. They want to love him, to help him, but he knows it will be a long, difficult fight. So he still refuses to become carnal. Carnalism will weaken his message, he says, and blur his focus so that he might lose sight of the real enemy of America: the usurper Obama who wants to create Civil War and destroy real Americans so aliens from outer space and other countries can take over and take jobs from everyone. And raise taxes. Not to mention kill granny.
He can't let that happen.
So he stays awake nights, always wary, with his trusty gun within reach, certain that someone will try to slip some Viagra into his drinking water, causing uncontrollable urges that would lead to carnalism and then besmirch his good name and destroy him. “It is truly dangerous out there,” he thinks to himself.
But for now he is contented. He is waiting. Soon, it will all be his for the taking.
Stay tuned for the sequel.
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