You have nothing to fear if you have nothing to hide. You have nothing to hide if you have nothing to fear.
So fear nothing and you need not hide. Hide nothing and you need not fear.

The motto of the Department of Homeland Decency


Monday, August 24, 2009

Jon Voight’s new movie fights the good fight

Can the universe be saved? Can America and Christians everywhere be kept from falling under the influence of secular humanists, liberals and all those unreal Americans from big cities and other planets?

Or will a few strong-willed, rugged men — all of whom have great hair, deep voices, and children who love them, by the way — somehow snap the hold these fake Americans have on us?

Those are the themes in this new, still untitled, Jon Voight sci-fi romance thriller. In it, Col. Chuck Williams, played by Voight, is retired and doing what he loves most — trying to convince his neighbors to keep guns around in case a band of “those unreal American, socialist, public-option, atheist, ACORN lovers come to town someday to register poor people to vote!”

“They look like us,” he continually warns anyone in earshot. “They drive cars like ours, listen to music like ours. They read our books, eat in our restaurants, date our women. They are starting to dress like us, too! You probably had some in your homes without realizing it. You might even be emailing or Twittering some of them.”

He looks very sad as he tells his neighbors these things.
It reminds him of the other great failure in his life; his gun giveaway program. They give away condoms in school, he told everyone who would listen. Why don’t we give away guns, too? Then our youth will be ready for whatever these socialist atheist Obama-loving unreal Americans have in mind.

But he could not convince others of the truth of his messages. His neighbors continued to allow secular humanists and ACORN organizers into their homes, where they often discussed loudly, late into the night, things like unions, boycotts, organic foods, and global warming — even in front of children! “It’s part of the master plan,” he realized. “They are going after the young kids, whose minds are not yet strong like mine. When I and those like me die, those youth will be the puppets of the socialists who want government to ration health care and kill our grannies!”

A love interest appears in his life unexpectedly one day when he is digging a bunker somewhere in the middle of his gated community. Far from the inner city, far away from any bus lines carrying low-paid workers to their jobs, a twenty-something blonde wanders in and sits down next to his gas grill. She is near death and isn’t sure how she got there. She thinks she was kidnapped by an ACORN worker from outer space, who transported her to their space ship where they gave her a physical exam and showed her how to use condoms and then gave her a copy of Saul Alinsky's “Rules for Radicals.”

Then they released her and she found her way to Col. Chuck, where she discovered her pockets were full of free condoms and “that Alinsky book”, as Col Chuck calls it. She is traumatized and wants to help him, so she asks what she can do to help save America. He says, “Just don’t tempt me. I can’t be carnal.”

And so begins an intense, but platonic relationship that ends when she decides she does not want to learn how to shoot a gun or even carry a gun to a town hall meeting organized by public-option advocates.

Almost too late, the truth of his message soon becomes apparent. In scattered hot spots around the world, people begin to burn their health insurance cards. They hold sit-ins in the golf courses all over the world that are favored by health insurance CEOs. They also speak loudly against the right of health insurance companies to charge whatever they want. It's becoming bedlam in many areas of the country, but Col. Chuck Williams knows what to do before this great country becomes a formerly great country paralyzed by socialism, atheism, liberalism, ACORNism, and unreal Americanism.

He teams up with a popular talk show host named Sean, both of whom have great hair. That means they are good leaders, because lots of real Americans think anyone with good hair genes probably have lots of other good genes, too. So together Sean and Col Chuck form a movement and an army and fight the good fight against the secular humanists, atheists, liberals, gun control advocates and all those unreal Americans from another planet who all live in big cities because they are afraid of the freedom of the wide open spaces of the American West. It's a long battle that goes on for several days, but they end up fighting to a draw, after which they retreat to their respective encampments.

They didn't win, but “we didn't lose,” Col. Chuck tells everyone. “So that's a victory.”
But then Col. Chuck goes on to greater glory. He finds that his hair and his voice talent bring him great attention, and he becomes the leader of gun lover’s and and tea baggers and real Americans everywhere. They so love him that they want him to become president of the nation. Or Sean. Sean could be president, too. Their team is deep, they now realize, so they know they can take on the unreal Americans from outer space who think it's OK if President Obama isn't a citizen and wants to give our country to ACORN.

Men follow him and women are drawn to him. They want to love him, to help him, but he knows it will be a long, difficult fight. So he still refuses to become carnal. Carnalism will weaken his message, he says, and blur his focus so that he might lose sight of the real enemy of America: the usurper Obama who wants to create Civil War and destroy real Americans so aliens from outer space and other countries can take over and take jobs from everyone. And raise taxes. Not to mention kill granny.

He can't let that happen.

So he stays awake nights, always wary, with his trusty gun within reach, certain that someone will try to slip some Viagra into his drinking water, causing uncontrollable urges that would lead to carnalism and then besmirch his good name and destroy him. “It is truly dangerous out there,” he thinks to himself.

But for now he is contented. He is waiting. Soon, it will all be his for the taking.

Stay tuned for the sequel.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Without mentioning names[url=http://www.newyorkgiantsofficialshop.com/]Jason Pierre-Paul Limited Jersey[/url]
th[url=http://www.newyorkgiantsofficialshop.com/]Victor Cruz Jersey[/url]
strong Cheap Jerseys demand for Florida well being insurance will entice well being insurance coverage firms to Florida which might be compelled to put calendar yr boundaries within their insurance policies or only cover benefits as much as a specific amount (an indemnity style coverage) in order to attempt and compete with stronger[url=http://www.seahawksofficialshop.com/]Authentic Marshawn Lynch Jersey[/url]
much more proven businesses Sprinkle having powder m[url=http://www.denverbroncosjerseyproshop.com/]Womens Peyton Manning Jersey[/url]
ter as well as function
ï»?A necessity to possess for th[url=http://www.newyorkgiantsofficialshop.com/]Womens Jason Pierre-Paul Jersey[/url]
Cheap Nike Air Jordan footwear supporters and likew[url=http://www.coltsofficialshoponline.com/]Womens Reggie Wayne Jersey[/url]
e who needs alleviate in ftIt doesn¡¯t matter that whether females know about fantasy football[url=http://www.greenbaypackersofficialstore.com/]Official Aaron Rodgers Jersey[/url]
it [url=http://www.coltsofficialshoponline.com/]Nike Andrew Luck Jersey[/url]
important for them to do their best to learn more about fantasy football even if you have zero knowledge about th[url=http://www.officialwashingtonredskinsprostore.com/]Womens Ryan Kerrigan Jersey[/url]
game

Anonymous said...

The printer driver is nothing more than some software that translates data into a format that your specific printer can understand Share friendshipAcknowledge someone's strengths Be sure to teach him the ;QUIET; command
~ "Defrag" ~Imagine a properly maintained hard drive as room the size of Wal-Mart filled with filing cabinets No sense in spreading anthrax[url=http://official49ersjerseystore.com/]Aldon Smith Jersey[/url]
ebola[url=http://ravensofficialnflshop.com/]Torrey Smith Elite Jersey[/url]
or other virus laced into small pox for rapid spreading through normal human interaction Whereas the Canon Law states that[url=http://redskinsfootballstore.com/]Pierre Garcon Kids Jersey[/url]
"In the celebration of the Eucharist[url=http://patriotsofficialshop.com/]Stevan Ridley Jersey[/url]
deacons and lay persons are not permitted to say the prayers[url=http://officialsteelersteamprostore.com/]Women's Antonio Brown Jersey[/url]
especially the eucharistic prayer[url=http://officialnflfalconsstore.com/]Matt Ryan Nike Jersey[/url]
nor to perform the actions which are proper to the celebrating priest

Anonymous said...

Dallas Cowboys Jerseys Open question:Dallas Cowboys Jerseys about Insurance, nfl jerseys, earl johnson, nike, post your answers to question: Dallas Cowboys Jerseys and help author: zhongqiuu! Thanks to all users to create this page Taylor beat Denver Broncos cornerback Champ Bailey, who received sixteen votes However, America first sport NFL(National Football League) also has a character of Sordan type, Among the objecting voices, Odell (2009) points out, are Frank Furedi, Professor of Sociology at the University of Kent and author of The End of Education and Professor David Uzzell at Surrey UniversityWhen such a doctrine into a normal phenomenon, people began to call it a curse At the moment basketball is seemingly one of several popular activity game of public who really liked sports
As I have said above liberal democracy is basically the same things as anarchism, and as anarchism is generally regarded as being a socialist doctrine, and in realisation of the true nature of political reality, then the true nature of the political concept of anarchism is basically the same thing as the true nature of the political concept of socialism As there are sites on the web that buy their form suppliers at wholesale then sell it to people at rock bottom prices Music icons such as Tupac Shakur, DrDre, Ice Cube and other hip-hop and rap musicians made snapback hats soar in popularity by wearing them in music videos, promotional pictures, concerts, and movies such as Poetic Justice and Boyz n the Hood I like the feeling of sporting the jersey and I pleased with my group it does not matter it wins or is beaten by other groups They may be the most expensive options, and are strictly for people who have the time to devote themselves to learning as their first prioritymunity OrganizationsIf you are involved with a community organization, contact them to see if there are scholarships for members (or former members)The Bills added 2 Rian Lindell area targets in the 2nd one fourth, including a 44-yarder on the last perform of the half, to head into the intermission with a 13-0 guideOn the interpretation side, the interpreter should be court certified, preferably

[url=http://patriotsofficialshop.com/]Rob Gronkowski Jersey[/url]
[url=http://www.broncosauthenticjerseys.com/]Peyton Manning Jersey[/url]
[url=http://www.newyorkgiantsteamproshop.com/]Jason Pierre-Paul Jersey[/url]